Easily one of the most powerful books I've ever read.
I had no idea before reading this book how much I didn't know.
I realized how many rape myths I unknowingly believed in.
I learned more about how sexual assault is defined.
"Frank “actually described two other rapes he did… And Frank had no idea that what he was describing to me were acts of rape.”
Predators like Frank get away with it over and over, [Dr. David] Lisak explained, because most of us are in denial. We’re disinclined to believe that someone who’s an attentive student or a congenial athlete could also be a rapist."
I learned about the misconception in society about rapists.
I learned of the predominance of acquaintance rape.
“…I was astounded by the ignorance of acquaintance rape… A very old concept of rape prevails. According to this mind-set, there can only be two precursors to rape: (1) A stranger jumps out of the bushes; (2) There is no rape unless the woman put up a fight, to the death if necessary.”
I learned the reality of a sexual assault victim's response.
“It was actually pretty common for women not to scream or call the cops in rape cases I prosecuted,” Roe said, “at least partly because women aren’t wired to react that way. We are socialized to be likeable and not to create friction. We are brought up to be nice. Women are supposed to resolve problems without making a scene—to make bad things go away as if they never happened.”
I was enlightened about the traumatic effects the justice system can have on sexual assault victims.
“The U.S. legal system is organized as an adversarial contest: in civil cases, between two citizens; in criminal cases, between a citizen and the state. Physical violence and intimidation are not allowed in court, whereas aggressive argument, selective presentation of the facts, and psychological attack are permitted, with the presumption that this ritualized, hostile encounter offers the best method of arriving at the truth. Constitutional limits on this kind of conflict are designed to protect criminal defendants from the superior power of the state, but not to protect individual citizens from one another….All citizens are presumed to enter the legal arena on an equal footing, regardless of the real advantages that one of the parties may enjoy. The Constitution, therefore, offers strong guarantees for the rights of the accused, but no corresponding protection for the rights of crime victims. As a result, victims who choose to seek justice may face serious obstacles and risks to their health, safety, and mental health.”
I learned about the way the American justice system functions.
“The courtroom oath--"to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth"--is applicable only to witnesses. Defense attorneys, prosecutors, and judges don't take this oath--they couldn't! Indeed, it is fair to say the American justice system is built on the foundation of not telling the whole truth. It is the job of the defense attorney--especially when representing the guilty--to prevent, by all lawful means, the "whole truth" from coming out.”
I learned about why reporting assault is so difficult for victims.
“After a victim has reported a crime to the police, many people believe that the decision whether or not to charge the suspect with a crime, and then prosecute the suspect, is the prerogative of the victim. News media often contribute to this misconception in stories about rape victims by reporting that a victim 'declined to press charges.' In fact, the criminal justice system gives victims no direct say in the matter. It's the police, for the most part, who decide whether a suspect should be arrested, and prosecutors who ultimately determine whether a conviction should be pursued.”
I gained a better understanding of and sympathy for sexual assault victims.
“Now, should we treat women as independent agents, responsible for themselves? Of course. But being responsible has nothing to do with being raped. Women don’t get raped because they were drinking or took drugs. Women do not get raped because they weren’t careful enough. Women get raped because someone raped them. JESSICA VALENTI The Purity Myth”
